Thanksgiving lunch will be a bittersweet celebration this year because it is the first holiday without my mother-in-law, Judy. She loved the holidays and had a flair for cooking and decorating. Judy was devoted to her family, and she spoiled us rotten. Everyone’s favorite recipes have always been on the menu. My preferred side dish is oyster casserole, and my father-in-law loves dressing cooked so long that it appears to be almost burnt. My brother-in-law insists on corn and coconut cake, while my husband favors pumpkin pie. No one’s special request has ever been ignored.
My parents both passed away a decade ago and so I realize our bruised hearts will never completely heal. When the savory flavors of Judy’s recipes melt into the tender places of our hearts, it will be difficult to swallow. I know Judy would insist that we maintain traditions for the sake of my grandchildren and then for the next generation. And so I will do my best to honor my mother-in-law and offer her favorite foods to our family with the help of my daughter. She grew up cooking by Judy’s side, and I am positive she can replicate her grandmother’s menu better than I.
Although we’ve suffered a great loss, we’ve been given the gift of my grandson, Jacob. He arrived on Palm Sunday. It was upon his birth that I realized how severely Judy’s health was failing. For years, she struggled with diabetes and heart disease. In May, we were informed that she was suffering from congestive heart failure and that our time with her was coming to an end.
I sorted through hundreds of family photos searching for just the right one highlighting Judy wearing a beautiful apron, cooking in her kitchen. I failed in this endeavor because Judy was usually the one taking the pictures. This is a snapshot of her last Christmas with my oldest grandson Matthew. The two were enchanted with each other.
The holidays are a tender time for those of us who have lost loved ones. I am comforted by the fact that Judy knew Jesus and accepted him as her savior. I do not doubt that she is feasting at the King of King’s banquet table. Close your eyes and attempt to imagine it. The crystal, the food, the wine and the light. Judy loved to savor good food, and I’m sure she’s taking delight in tasting creamy mashed potatoes with butter and tiny sweet peas. I can smell the yeast rolls smothered in butter. The turkey is moist, tender and roasted to perfection. And the coconut cake is something out of this world. She is not worried about diabetes and blood sugar levels. Her suffering is over.
I know I’ll never be able to offer a meal as delicious as Judy’s because she had a gift for the art of cooking and entertaining. But I’ll do my best to practice the lessons she taught me. She valued family and traditions and cherished time spent together enjoying good food. My turkey will probably be dry, and my rolls won’t come close to being as tasty, but I will prepare every dish with love.
I give thanks to the Lord for Judy. I mourn her loss, but I am comforted by the knowledge that someday we will be reunited, and we will enjoy a feast together again with other family members who have gone on before us.
Psalms 30:5… Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning.
#FamilyThanksgiving #Weepingmaytarry #joycomesinthemorning
That was beautiful, Shelia. I loved the pictures. I’m sure you & Evan will make a wonderful meal.
Thank you Pam! I appreciate you encouragement. Happy Thanksgiving!
What a great tribute, Sheila! I didn’t know Judy. John was my (much admired) company commander during my time in South Korea back in the early 70’s. I was one of his LT’s! Through the past few years, I have reconnected with John, and I know how devoted he was to Judy. I grieve with him, and with all of you, in her loss. My own Dad died about a year and a half ago, and the hole he left in my heart will never be plugged up. I loved the tribute, and I know John loved it, too. The pictures are great, but especially the one with all of you around the table. It reminds me so much of my own family. I’m the oldest of 6, and we still get together often. Keep those traditions going! In the final analysis, friends and family are ALL that matters. I’m doing my best to instill those great traditions within my own family … our 5 kids and 6 (almost 7!) grandchildren! I know the Thanksgiving holiday will be bittersweet for all of you, but know that Judy would heartily approve of what you’re doing! Give my very best to John, and may we all know the many blessings we have to be thankful for.
Thank you for your kind words. Best wishes to you and your family for a Happy Thanksgiving!
Sheila what a wonderful and beautiful tribute to Judy and so true. I miss her calling me to check in. Have a good holiday remembering the good times.
Thank you Betty. Give Goober a hug for us. Happy Thanksgiving!
Such a sweet and loving remembrance of Judy. She was truely a gifted person and could make you feel so welcomed into her life. She was a blessing to us also and we miss her. Thinking of you and our extended family this holiday season. We will make some new traditions and hold onto some old ones to carry over for our children. Such a blessing to have large families. I loved you tribute!
Shelia, your photos and comments were like a visit with Judy and John! What memories we have
shared these many years. They have instilled their love and kindness with in your family, And and their many friend. Judy’s spirit will live on in our hearts until we see her again. Love to all the family. Mary Jo and Aubrey Young
Thank you very much for your kind words. Happy Thanksgiving!
inagine my surprise when I started reading this beautiful tribute to a woman I much admired, and there was a picture of my Mom (Edith King Howser) in the family picture. You all were always so good to her and treated her like family. Judy and I used to laugh and say we were sisters of a sort. This will be our second Thanksgiving without Mom, and it hasn’t quit hurting yet. My Dad dies in 1988, so Mom was my rock. We will miss them forever. My love to all your family. Love, Debbie
I loved Mrs. Edith. When I grow up, I want to be just like her. Elegant, kind and loving.
While I look at these pictures through my tears, I also know what a better place Judy is in and she can eat anything she wants to now. I bet she’s taking orders from our Lord and all the angels wanting to know what their favorite food is for Christmas. Bruce and I miss her also. Her family was her life and you all have been so blessed to have her. Even when Judy did not feel good, she could out do me on a good day. What a beautiful tribute and please keep up your traditions for Judy. We love you all. Glenda and Bruce